On Beauty. (part one)

We can be so critical of others. And ourselves. I do not want to generalize women, because I understand this struggle is not exclusively weighing on us. Also, some of you do not struggle with this at all. But, if you could allow me to speak in general terms: We. Can. Be. So. Critical.

Beauty is a tough subject to address. We are saturated with thoughts, opinions, perceptions and so much ‘noise’ concerning beauty. It is challenging to have a good handle on what it is to be beautiful.

 Buy this makeup, style your hair this way, use this expensive lotion, what is your bedtime skincare regiment, slim your figure, shop here, wear this, …

All of these ‘tips’ on being beautiful are supposed to make us look a certain way, and if we look a certain way, is that when we feel beautiful? Or do we feel like there is always something else we need to do to measure up to an unattainable standard of beauty?

In the midst of the above mentioned ‘noise’ concerning beauty, I read something really refreshing. One of my favorite bloggers, Joanna Goddard from Cup of Jo, does a series on her blog called, my beauty uniform. In each post, women share about beauty, but Joanna has approached the subject in a way that helps celebrate each woman’s individual beauty and what works for them. It is super helpful and refreshing. I never feel like I need to compare myself to these women, but instead I find myself celebrating their journey of figuring out what makes them feel beautiful. There are of course practical tips and products as a part of their routines, but there is also this under current in each post that communicates a woman’s ability to feel confident and comfortable in her skin. Joanna finally shared her own regiment this week on her blog, and although you should take the time to read all of it, here is the part that stood out the most to me:

 When are times in your life that you’ve felt beautiful?

Honestly, I always feel beautiful around my children. If you wake up with bad breath and frizzy hair and dark circles, they don’t see that. They see your essence. It’s almost as if they literally can’t see how you physically look. They just see your laugh, your eyes lighting up, your playfulness, your warmth. I always feel like this beautiful creature around them because they just run to me and hug me and climb on me. I love those little rugrats!

So amazing, right?! Reading this caused me to pause and really soak up her words. There is so much truth in her statement, and in the way our children see us. They are not concerned with clean hair or under eye cream, but they notice if we are happy or sad. They notice when we are distracted, and distant. I think our children can sense when our spirits are unsettled, and they feed so much off of our demeanor. So when we are comfortable in our skin, they think we are most beautiful.

I also began processing how I would answer the same question: when do I feel beautiful?

Pre-baby, some of the times I’ve felt most beautiful are when I’ve returned from a long, hard run. The kind of run that is more ‘good for the soul’ than ‘good for the body.’ When you’ve pushed hard, and processed tough stuff, and are taking care of your heart and body simultaneously. When I look in the mirror, my skin is dewy with sweat, and my cheeks are rosy and warm. My fine baby hairs around my face and neck are curling ringlets, framing my face. I feel beautiful, and strong.

Since Leo has entered my world, I’d say the times I feel most beautiful are on Saturday mornings, when we linger in bed too long, and my teeth are un-brushed, my top knot is disheveled and I haven’t taken the time to look in a mirror yet, but Casper and Leo laugh at me and cuddle up to me like I’m the best thing in the whole world. In those moments I feel like the only woman alive, and I want to bottle the beauty that radiates!

Now I’m turning it on you, when do you feel most beautiful? Instead of focusing on the things we’d like to change about ourselves, let’s stop being critical and start being positive. Please take the time to comment and share with me when you feel beautiful … I’d love to hear!